The most stupid thing I can remember happened to me this morning. It’s a ridiculous story and is true.
I went to bed late last night and slept in a bit. As I was waking, which is always a process, I heard what I assumed was the garbage truck, maybe on the next block. I hurried out of bed, threw on some shorts and a shirt and stepped outside to take the garbage can to the roadside. I was still really sleepy and clumsy as I pulled the trashcan across the front yard toward the street. I glanced down the street and saw a young couple about four houses away walking casually in my direction in the roadway. She was walking alongside he, who was carrying in one hand a large black bag of (apparently) trash, holding it by the red drawstring. I parked the garbage can by the road and wondered absently why the guy was carrying trash down the street. It occurred to me that maybe he had also heard the garbage truck coming and he and his girl were walking to meet the truck. I looked up again at the couple and they were now three houses away. I realized that it was not a bag of trash at all but a big shaggy black dog on a red leash. I broke out into laughter at myself. Then I noticed that all the cans up and down the street were upside down and empty. I had missed the garbage truck after all. I rolled the garbage can back across the yard and toward the side of the house. I knew for certain that this couple was laughing at me after watching me pull the can to the street and then back. And I was sure that they were amused at the silly man laughing all by himself at nothing at all.
I could tell I needed my coffee right away.
